Monday, December 1, 2014

Watch Mickey Rourke "Beat" A Homeless Man In A Boxing Match

So this is the kind of stuff celebrities do when we aren't watching them on the big screen...

Mickey Rourke used to be known for many things.  He was a Hollywood leading man, drawing audiences to the theaters with his classical good looks and charisma.  Then, after that all went to Hell, he channeled his tough guy persona into a boxing career.

That's the haircut you wanted to go with?

He actually did fight too, and enough that soon after due to the fighting and his love of plastic surgery, his good looks were pretty much gone.

However, he was after many years able to return to acting, playing the tough guy roles in movies like Sin City, Once Upon A Time in Mexico, and even Iron Man 2.  

So along with his resurrected Hollywood career, Rourke apparently decided that he would like to box again.  Or somebody with money they didn't know what to do with decided that he should.

Thus we have this footage forever online:

Yes, that is Mickey Rourke, plus bad tattoos and an even worse 90's lesbian haircut taking on another "boxer" in a Russian venue.  Oh what a year to be alive in.

The 62-year-old takes on a man described as a "homeless drifter" and then proceeds to "beat" him in a "boxing match" which should be shown in a master class on "How To Take A Dive."

And then, right on cue, the Daily Mail reports that Rourke's opponent, Elliot Seymour (age: 29; professional record: 1-10) is a "homeless drifter" who trains at Rourke's gym, and who was paid to lose. I do not know whether or not Elliot Seymour was paid to lose. But based on the fight itself, it is fairly clear that he lost on purpose.

Above in the video you can see the action as it unfolds.  Although in case you want to skip the embarrassment here is the play by play.  In the first round, Rourke walks around slowly, barely punching at all, as his opponent pokes weakly in his general direction. In the second round, Rourke grazes his opponent's side with a body shot, and his opponent goes down to a knee. The Russian announcers can be heard laughing at this "knock down." The opponent gets up; Rourke slaps at him a couple more times with body shots that do not even appear to land, but the opponent goes down again, and stays down, and the announcers laugh again.

Clearly this is the beginning of some sort of real life Hunger Games, it just needs the right director and some chainsaws hanging from the ceiling and we might have something.  

Oh, and also drop the corruption and ridiculousness.

Hope Seymour made enough to get himself a place to live.

What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine  

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