Monday, October 20, 2014

Beer Brewer Buys All The Count Chocula Leaving Cereal Fans Saddened

It was a sad day for delicious sugary cereal fans in Fort Collins, Colorado earlier this month when a beer brewer strolled into a grocery store and made a rather large purchase.  That purchase consisted of every single box of the Halloween centric, but delicious anytime of the year cereal Count Chocula.  A cereal so confused that it cannot decide whether it wants to be Cocoa Puffs or Lucky Charms, so it decided to just be both and make everyone have diabetes.

...but oh is it a sweet ride into debilitating health conditions.

The brewer snatched up the spooky cereal, which is a limited edition, in order to make a special holiday beer.  Because the only thing that you could possibly add to Count Chocula to make it better would be alcohol.  Thus, to make the beer that everyone wants, they needed cereal.  All of the cereal.

This caused a least one resident who must not have very much else to look forward to in their life to write into the Fort Collins Coloradoan to proclaim their disappointment.

"Every year I greatly look forward to the month of October when I can purchase a few boxes of this delicious chococlatey (sic) goodness," Kristen Clark wrote in a letter to the editor.

Sorry Ms. Clark, but sometimes you gotta strike while the iron is hot, or while the cereal is still dry, or some sort of analogy about getting things early.

In addition to beers made from Golden Grahams, Reese's Puffs, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Black Bottle Brewery brews a special beer called Cearealiously Count Chocula, and needed as much cereal as they could get their hands on.
There is no need for concerned citizens to worry though. Despite the brewer's huge purchase, the Coloradoan reports that other grocery stores in the vicinity have plenty of Count Chocula to go around. If you want it, you gotta fight for it, residents of Fort Collins.

I wonder if their breakfast flavored beers count as part of the balanced breakfast?


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