Thursday, August 14, 2014

Woman Avoids Traffic Ticket By Nearly Dying

Good news ladies (and men)!  No longer will you have to worry about flirting with a police officer after committing a traffic offense.  Never again will you have to fake crying to get out of a fine.  There is a new tried and true 100% way to get out of any traffic stop.  Just come close to dying, and you're home free.

I see here that you are dying.  I'm gonna let you off with a warning.

Just follow in the footsteps of one Kalamazoo, MI woman who after running a red light right in front of a cop, did the only thing she could to get out of it.  She nearly killed herself.

The woman, who was eating a hotdog whilst driving (what some would call a good ol' time) quickly realized she had made a terrible mistake, when she began choking on the delicious food.

By the time she pulled over allowing the officer to reach her window, she could barely breathe.

The officer quickly decided that traffic problems were the least of this woman's concern.  He pulled her out of the car and began performing the Heimlich maneuver. Eventually, he was able to dislodge both the 'dog and its bun, declaring "Holy shit," as the traumatized woman began hysterically crying.


The woman was not ticketed, and the officer is now being regarded as a hero.  

See?  Sometimes nearly dying: Total win/win.

Don't worry, there's totally dash cam video:






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