Thursday, February 28, 2013

It Is Thursday Lets Talk About Music

Welcome to a new feature, where every Thursday I am gonna write about music.  Whether it is a throwback to something from my past, or a new exciting subject I wanna discuss.  For the inaugural piece, I have decided to talk about a man who I am glad existed in music, and genuinely believe is important for fans of music to know.  That man is Russell Tyrone Jones, the man better known as Ol' Dirty Bastard. Yes, the person who probably just mentioning drummed up ridiculous memories in your head of collecting welfare checks, drunken antics, and erratic behavior.  I am going to tell you not only why I think he is important to music, but was truly one of a kind (aside from all the craziness of course.)

ODB got his start in the public eye as part of the legendary Wu-Tang Clan, which burst onto the rap scene in 1993 with their now classic album Enter The Wu-Tang (36 Chambers.)  Nine incredibly unique and immensely lyrical rappers formed the group out of various Burroughs of New York City, through the recruitment of the groups founder and main producer RZA.  Wu-Tang was unlike any other group in rap, a huge roster of MC's who rapped interlaced their tough street lifestyle raps with mystical Chinese imagery, straight from the numerous Kung-Fu movies the members had a mutual love for.  They delivered these lyrics over soul and R&B samples interspersed with soundbites from those same Kung-Fu films, deftly composed by genius producer RZA.

RZA also proved to be a savvy business man, securing the Wu-Tang Clan an unprecedented record deal that would allow each individual member to sign their own record contract at any label, and release their own solo material separate from the Wu-Tang catalog.

However, even in a group with so many unique personalities and sounds,  the man who was called Ol' Dirty, managed to form his own unique lane.  His voice, at the same time whiny and raspy, was instantly recognizable on any Wu-Tang recording.  His penchant for breaking into singing a off key, tone deaf singing would further help listeners single him out.

Also, ODB created a unique, almost fierce image, without consciously doing so, that would prove to make him easily recognizable. Twisting his hair up into braids that were angled in every direction, his mouth sparkling with diamonds set into a gold grill (way before grills were in the least bit fashionable.)  He looked and seemed like someone from certain rough and tough sections of Brooklyn, because that is exactly what he was.

There is more to this guy, I promise.

The reason why I decided to write this article is because it can be easy to remember ODB as the picture above.  An interestingly eccentric, and often seemingly crazy individual who was a member of Wu-Tang before his death in 2004 from a drug overdose.  His legacy can be clouded by his brushes with the law, and struggle with drugs and alcohol.  Musically though, his impact on rap music is important especially in a time where many fans of Hip Hop lament the genre as becoming too watered down and generic, where many songs sound so similar they blend together and are forgotten all too soon.

ODB released his first solo album in 1995 right off the wave of success experienced by the now super famous Wu-Tang.  The album Return To The 36 Chambers: The Dirty Version followed much in suit with the Wu-Tang's first release, with heavy production from RZA and numerous guest appearances from Wu-Tang Clan members.  However, ODB made the album his own, creating a genuine classic, and an album lauded not only by fans but applauded by serious music critics.

Throughout Return, ODB delivered his raucous, intense, street rhymes about the things he had seen and been forced to endure during his then 25 years of living in poverty before his talent took him to the heights of fame almost overnight.  He delivered his serious and intensely profane lyrics in a half-singing, half-rhyming style. ODB going so far as to comment that he had grown up listening to the likes of Al Green and Soul music. He had dreamed of being a singer, so when he got to make music, decided he would be a singer, even if he couldn't sing.

This mentality helped him to produce a sound that has never been replicated in Hip Hop, one thats both incredibly entertaining and I believe one of a kind.  ODB remained the same person he was from his block in Brooklyn, sustaining on welfare checks and Kung-Fu classics. He could never become more than what he was all his life before he "made it."  In fact, he didn't want to. In fact he even graced the cover of his album with one of the most unique covers of all time, not some material display of wealth, or buxom beauty, but a recreation of his government issued assistance card.



ODB would release another album in 1999 and further build this kind of sound.  Intense, unique, and above all so immensely raw.  This is what I want people to remember, to not let whatever preconceived notions you may have of ODB but to genuinely listen to his music.  Even if you don't think you would like it, especially if you are a fan of Hip Hop and haven't heard it.  Even if people don't care for it, they should know that it is important to the legacy of Hip Hop music.

ODB died prematurely at the age of 35 while recording his third album, after being released from a lengthy stint in jail.  A theme that would follow his life in the public eye until he died was the troubles he often brought upon himself.  Various brushes with the police over guns and drugs, and various stints incarcerated.  His insistence on being himself, sometimes not suiting his more conspicuous lifestyle.  Ultimately this lifestyle brought him to his death, and I am saddened to have lost him.  To me his legacy lives on, not in his public persona, but through his unique music, and to at least have had that I am content.




What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine


Wednesday, February 27, 2013

Kate Upton Graces Second Sports Illustrated Cover Meanwhile Haters Hate

For the second year in a row, modeling's current "IT" girl Kate Upton has graced the cover of Sports Illustrated's annual swimsuit edition.  If you are not familiar, it is the one edition where actual sports journalism is replaced by the adolescent dreams of young males from all around the globe.  The 20 year old Upton has reached a new level of popularity, joining the super famous model level of beauties like Elle McPherson who also made numerous covers.

Since she first graced the cover of SI last year, the blond model has become a genuine sensation. Upton has kept in the public's eye by causing an internet sensation by dancing, starring in every other commercial on television, and generally looking like this:

Is that snow?
This year Upton topped her previous cover by joining the SI crew in Antarctica, becoming the first model to wear a bikini around penguins in their natural habitat.  Sports Illustrated seemingly wanted to increase Upton's famous status, while simultaneously making it impossible to top themselves next year.  Nailed it!  Upton has been making the rounds of national shows, appearing on David Letterman and Jimmy Fallon's late night talk shows. 

The cover and photos were not without controversy however, with SI being criticized for taking such a famous model to the coldest place in the world so that she could wear a bikini. Upton took the shoot in stride although she did describe it as tough, stating:

"It was freezing. I had frostbite when I came back. I was worried about my body, it was shutting down because it was working so hard to keep me warm."
Another controversy that appeared over the cover was the alleged disdain the other SI models have towards Upton.  They reportedly refuse to speak to the rising star, and are jealous of her meteoric rise to household status.  The young model appears to not let the haters bother her though, and instead continue to fascinate and titillate people everywhere.  Ultimately all the models can do is hate, because they didn't make a cover photo on the level of this:
Haters gonna hate, meanwhile I'm Antarctica Ballin.
What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine




Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Hey Ladies! Big Weekend For Women In Sports

This past Saturday Anaheim California played host to UFC 157, in what would be a milestone in the relatively young organization's history.  UFC 157 marked the historic occasion of women finally gaining a foothold in the as so far male dominated promotion.   UFC President Dana White had to eat his words, as he had claimed prviously that women would "never" make it into the Ultimate Fighting Championship. Many UFC fans were happy in White having to backpedal while at the same time welcoming the women.

Let's see you be smug now baldie!

Undefeated Judo specialist Ronda Rousey put the Women's Bantamweight Championship on the line against former Marine and season veteran Liz Carmouche.  Rousey had been named champion in a ceremony before the fight, so this was her first defence of the brand new belt.  The UFC welcomed the women in style pitting their championship fight as the main event in an already impressive roster of fights.  Also on the bill, veteran fighters Dan Henderson took on Lyoto Machida in the co-main event, and fan favorite Uriah Faber met Ivan Menjivar. There were some other fights too, one of the fighters had curly hair, another had a beard, that's about all you need to know about them.

Uriah Faber, also known as "The California Kid"  met dangerous opponent Ivan Menjivar in a fight where both contenders are one win away from getting a shot at the Bantamweight title.  Faber dominated the fight, ending it in the first round by rear-naked choke, which sounds way more scandalous than it really is, as both men kept their shorts on.  More importantly, Faber returned to the ring with his signature cornrows, prompting this writer to question: Was it the cornrows?

Definitely the cornrows.
Next came the co-main event of the night in which veteran fighter Dan Henderson also known as "man that guy was a badass, but now I can't tell if he is good still or just able to take a lot of punches" took on Lyoto Machida AKA The Dragon (seriously, he is called The Dragon.)  These two exciting fighters, known for their highlight knockout reels, took to the octagon in rousing cheers from the fans, only to provide a fight that can be best summed up by this picture.

BORING!
Henderson failed to connect with much, as a careful Machida danced around the ring, landing few but powerful shots.  Machida would go on to win a split decision, many fans checked their watches.

However, the main event proved to be worth the wait, definitely more than enough to wake that baby up.  The women fighters were welcomed into the UFC by huge cheers from the crowd, and unlike the previous fight, definitely delivered excitement.  Rousey, who came into the match as the undefeated favorite was looking to continue her streak of 6 first round wins by submission.  She looked to deploy her lethal arm bar, which as of yet no opponent could stop.  Her plans were almost dashed when early into the round Carmouche got on top of Rousey's back and came close to submitting the star.

That move would prove Carmouche's only moment as Rousey calmly took her to the ground, and secured that famous arm bar submission move. Succeeding in submitting Carmouche before the end of the first round.  It was a quick but thoroughly exciting fight,  Rousey impressively living up to her "Rowdy" nickname.

Get it girl, but seriously, congratulations.

Rousey,  who is a previous Olympic Judo Gold Medalist (the only American to ever accomplish this) will be a fitting first champion for the promotion.  Her skills added to an already incredibly deep roster of world class talent.  Rousey was very happy with her win asking the crowd:

"Is this real life? I'm not sure."

Monday, February 25, 2013

85th Annual Oscars Where Already Famous People Celebrate Each Other More

Last night the city of Los Angeles hosted the 85th annual Oscars.  Rich people from all over Hollywood gathered to give each other golden awards and celebrate for themselves how talented and rich they are.

The awards show was preceded by the usual red carpet, the unique pre-show that puts most people to sleep before the real event even begins. Numerous famous people were asked hurried, awkward questions, then cut off before they could give a significant answer.  So, they nailed it!  this year the pre-festivities were hosted by the gorgeous Kelly Rowland, and known Hollywood tiny person Kristin Chenoweth.  

Chenoweth is the short one.

The actual event was hosted by Seth McFarlane, the guy who everyone watching the Oscars immediately Googled because they had no idea who he was.  Then said, "Oh yeah, that's the guy that makes those shows I used to like, then I got a little bit older and realized were awful."  He actually was funny though and further illustrated the point that he should stop making television shows and do something (anything) else.  McFarlane was a fresh choice, and a significant savings for the Oscar production staff, no longer having to pay to release Billy Crystal from career prison so he could perform for one night.

Don't put me back in! I'll host anything you want!
Famous actors and actresses graced the stage to present awards, while proving that movie magic is what makes them so great as again and again their skits fell flat.  This year marked a departure for the Oscars, whereby some presenters gave away two awards at once, mostly for the awards nobody remembers like makeup, costume design, and cinematography.

This year the Oscars also had a theme, that was the celebration of music in movies.  Actors came out to sing some memorable numbers from film, like Catherine Zeta Jones from Chicago, and the cast from Les Miserables. This was good until a real singer (Jennifer Hudson) took the stage, and showed everyone who you should cast in every music number in every movie from now on (hint- Jennifer Hudson.)  Adele also performed, it was good, because that is her job.

She should have just sung everything.

Famous actors and actresses graced the stage to present awards, while proving that movie magic is what makes them so great as again and again their skits fell flat.  This year marked a departure for the Oscars, whereby some presenters gave away two awards at once, mostly for the awards nobody remembers like makeup, costume design, and cinematography.

A bunch of people won awards, but here are the ones that you care about.  Christoph Waltz won Best Supporting actor, if he can just be in a Tarantino movie every year he will be set.  He thanked Tarantino in his speech, and every time the camera cut to Quentin he looked more and more drunk/smug.  Anne Hathaway won Best Supporting Actress for Les Miserables, her giant mouth probably helped her to sing better thus securing the award.  Jennifer Lawrence (JLaw as I like to call her) won Best Actress for "Silver Linings Playbook" but all anyone will remember about her speech is the part where she fell trying to walk to the stage.

Don't fall, don't fall, don't fall....SHIT!
In the category of "Just Give The Award To Daniel Day Lewis" (Best Actor,) Daniel Day Lewis won the Oscar for Lincoln.  After his speech The Academy decided to suspend Best Actor and just give it to Lewis (Day-Lewis?) every year after he revealed that he had in fact been playing everyone at the Oscars that night THE WHOLE TIME!

Ang Lee won the award for Best Director for his film Life of Pi which showed that you can make a boring movie about a guy in a boat with some animals, but as long as it looks awesome you'll win best director!  Lee won Best Director for the second time after winning in 2006 for Brokeback Mountain.

Noe for the one award that people actually remember, Best Picture.  The award was presented by First Lady Michelle Obama, and a pretty drunk Jack Nicholson, so they really saved the best for last in all accounts.

Is this the Golden Globes?

The winner was Argo, even though the Academy snubbed director Ben Affleck, not even giving him a best director nomination, he still won the big one.  This is actually a big deal, because it usually doesn't happen.  In fact, it hasn't happened since 1989 when Driving Ms. Daisy won the big award but not the director one.  Argo was the dark horse candidate in a category that saw some amazing films, and congratulations to Mr. Affleck.  He took the stage with fellow producer George Clooney and gave a passionate speech about learning how to be better at making movies.

That's it, the Oscars happened.  Some of it was funny, MOST of it was boring, they nailed it!  In reality though everyone could have stayed home, because throughout the night there was clearly one winner at life, that man as always was George Clooney.

Looking like a suave Ernest Hemingway!


What did you think? Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine

Sunday, February 24, 2013

Fundays: Where I Show You Things On The Internet

Welcome to another Funday, where we kick back together and look at some stuff from the internet I liked this past week.  Then at the end, I pick something from the week to put in the Funday Hall of Fame.  So come look as some stuff, it can be anything.  Just, relax, scroll down, and have some fun.

Music

Action Bronson

Did you ever listen to Ghostface and think: "Man, Ghostface is the coolest dude on the planet, I wish there was another rapper who was like him so that I could double up on Ghostface style music."  Well if you ever did think that then rejoice!  For there IS a rapper who sounds like Ghostface, and he is also from NYC (although from Brooklyn and not Staten Island.)  Action is a former chef, turned to dope as lyricist, he is playfully known as the "white Ghostface" and fits that moniker due to his raspy delivery.  He also loves to rap about food, and has a tattoo of an old school BMW M3, so what I am saying is listen to his music, its RAD.



Danny Brown

Danny Brown raps like the way I think a crackhead would rap if he found a genie and wished to be lyrically talented.  He laughs like a crackhead, and he even kind of looks like a crackhead.  He also makes music that you should listen to.



 

Pony Time

Have you ever just wanted to give up everything and move to a big city, to live out a poor but exciting lifestyle in a haze of drugs and anonymous sex?  If you did do that, Pony Time would be your soundtrack.






Skrillex

Listen, I don't need to tell you about Skrillex, if you haven't at least heard about him, you probably aren't the kind of person who is visiting this blog.  Anyway, there are many people who love Skrillex, and many people who hate him, they're probably about equal in number.  My point is sometimes even musicians like Skrillex, who people think they have figured out completely, can surprise you.  This song surprised me.





People

Charlamagne Tha God

Yes, this is the name he goes by.  Charlamagne is a super popular radio host on Power 105.1 in New York City.  He also is a guy who tells everyone, including famous people, exactly what he thinks of them, to their face. Everyday on the morning show The Breakfast Club he gives a person his "Donkey of The Day Award" for being generally an asshole in some way. Don't cheat yourself. Follow him on Twitter.

Add caption

Nardwuar

Nardwuar is a guy from Vancouver British Columbia Canada. He works for a radio station there.  He dresses ridiculously.  He also gives the best interviews of musicians that you will ever see in your life.  How?  He exhaustively researches his subject beforehand and conducts the interview by giving his subject gifts (usually of music) that not only surprise the musicians themselves (they often wonder how he knows these things HINT- it's because he does his research)  but also surprise the viewer of the interview.  Who knew that a rapper like E-40 loves the 70's soul group Con Funk Shun?  Nardwuar did, and he surprised E-40 with the record.  The best part about the interviews is that Nardwuar shows you how much the people who are making music you love, love music themselves, and are often inspired by things you would never guess. Here is Nardwuar interviewing E-40.




Technology

PS4

Sony unveiled the PS4 this past week, and for a little while people on the internet were amazed.  And for once, happy and excited about something.  Then people started to think about the PS4 and the way Sony introduced it.  Some of those people are smart, and good at writing about things.  One of those people named John Teti wrote an article about what he thought about the PS4.  Read it, it doesn't matter if you like video games, it is a good article period. Here it is.


Automatically Resizing Font

Sometimes you need to sit back and really appreciate the amazing fucking world we live in.  Everyday it seems, there is another amazing invention by genius people, that continues to shock and awe us as a population here on this planet.  Sometimes it is an invention that is just plain cool, this one is just plain cool.  Read about it here.

Sports

Michael Jordon's Birthday

Sports are an obvious and undeniable part of present society all over the world.  They can be a great equalizer, where people from all kinds of different backgrounds can instantly feel the same elation, joyous exhuberance, crushing defeat, and hopelessness.  This week marked the big 5-0 of one of sport's most beloved and enduring figures Michael Jordan.  If you didn't get a chance I wrote about it here.  Jordan has reached a unique place in popular culture, where he has already become a legend even though he still (hopefully) has a long life ahead of him.  It can be hard to even realize that he is actually a real person who was actually kind of a dick when he was a player.  That's one of the great things about sports writing, that between writers we can get two kinds of articles about the same person, simultaneously showing the greatness that makes us all love Jordan, and the reality that is east to forget.  Both of these articles are great examples of how fascinating sports writing can be.

This one, written by Emma Carmichael of Deadspin, shows the former.  A great firsthand account by Craig Ehlo, a veteran NBA player best known as the guy on the other side of "the shot," one of Michael's most enduring moments. A buzzer beater in Game 5 of the 1989 Eastern Conference playoffs that simultaneously sent the Cleveland Cavaliers packing and helped build the mythos of His Airness.

This article is written by David Roth for VICE magazine.  It discusses the real Michael Jordan, the one we so often forget, who was narcissistic and angry on the court.  A man, who now being 50 is tired and an almost pitiful character, a man who has conquered so much he has nothing left but retirement.

Both of these stories are excellent, and both help you to remember the real Michael Jordan, who is all these things and more.

Television

Game of Thrones

Game of Thrones is coming back to television for season 3.  They just put out a trailer.  I posted it below.  That's all I need to say.

 

 Funny

Questions

This.  Just watch it. Watch the whole thing.





Art Ballin'

I am really tempted to just make Riff Raff a constant feature of Fundays.  I am finding it hard to not include him every week, because there is always something he is doing every week that is hilarious.  Until I decide, just watch this.

 

Funday Hall of Fame

Action Bronson 

I was really tempted to give it to Riff Raff again this week, (even though he made the Hall of Fame last week) off the strength of the Art Ballin' video alone.  However, I decided this week I had to give the honors to the big bearded homie, Action Bronson.  He raps about food, in a totally un-corny way, he makes songs with titles like "Hot Shots Part Deaux,"  and mixtapes called "Rare Chandeliers" that have a cover like this:

Please tell me you understand how awesome this is.
He has lines like this:

"Sing with an accent, Portuguese. See me wiggle the Porsche keys, grapes, crackers, gorgeous cheese.  Shifting gears left hand at the Mighty Morphin' speeds..."

By now you either get it why this guy is awesome, or you don't, and if you don't, I don't know what more to say to you. This guy is blowing up all over music right now, and I couldn't be happier about it.  Congratulations Action Bronson, you deserve it.

Here is a song where Bronson collaborated with fellow Funday Hall of Famer Riff Raff, it is great.






What did you think? Check out last weeks Funday here.  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine

Saturday, February 23, 2013

Serious Saturdays: Young People

This week on Serious Saturday, the topic for my editorial took me a while to choose.  Eventually, instead of choosing something that was in the news, I have decided to pick a topic that I want to bring to light, that of young people and their portrayal by the media.  The best way to begin, is with this quote:

"Who is this Paul McCartney guy?  Why is an old man on stage at the Grammys?"

This quote came from a Twitter user (who will remain anonymous) during last years Grammy celebration.  Twitter became awash with young people who genuinely had no idea who the man performing on stage was. "Who is Paul McCartney" even became a trending topic on the site.

Obviously, McCartney is so well known for being a member of The Beatles, writing roughly half of their material over a career in music that has spanned over 50 years.  These young people almost certainly have all heard of The Beatles, a band that by sheer osmosis is undeniable in the culture of the world.

This event and the ignorance of the young people on Twitter wasn't unnoticed by the press.  Many stories (like this one) were published the day after the event.  It raised an interesting point about the youth of today.  That point being that in a world where young people have been raised on computers, where almost any information is literally at your fingertips, that those same young people could be so blissfully ignorant.  That instead of broadcasting their ignorance to the virtual world, they could take a few seconds and actually type "Paul McCartney" into their Google search bar.

This is an interesting point, and moreover one that fits well into the topic of this piece.  This  event is a small part of how youth of today is being portrayed by media, as an uncaring, shallow, ignorant group of people whose apathy is at the forefront of their lifestyle.  In the internet society, where young people are indeed plugged in constantly, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and Tumblr have given youth a place to air out anything that is on their mind, and share their every opinion.  Along with that podium often comes young people's inability to think before they speak, and speak to the world.

The realization that they may seem shallow or apathetic may not cross their mind before they put themselves out there.  The ease by which they can let themselves be heard is amazing, it is just that often times they mistakenly trumpet their ignorance to the masses.

 With social media comes television, where shows on MTV like Parental Control, and Next showcase vapid youth in scripted "reality" situations with teens who are created by the network to become terrible stereotypes.  These dating shows portray this notion of teens in a negative aspect that is so innacurate it boarders on offensive. 

This notion of a negative view of young people is not a radically new one.  It is just perpetuated by the world we live in today.  Whereas youth from the past didn't have the resources available to them by technology that young people have today. The teens of today can use this podium in either way, by declaring their foolishness,  or by grasping this outlet as a way to tell the world about what makes them a great part of our society.  Too often in the media it it becomes easy to just go with the status quo and paint them in a negative light.  Often, they just don't do themselves many favors.


However, the point of this editorial is not to showcase how awful today's young people are, but to do quite the opposite.  I believe that young people are fascinating and can be incredibly insightful and intelligent when given the right situation.  One unfortunately just has to look a little deeper and they can find this to be true.  One example is this video:




Just in case you didn't get to watch it, this video comes from a series on YouTube done by The Fine Brothers, a comedy film making duo adult of siblings who in this particular show take teenagers and show them popular things from the internet.  They then videotape the teens' reactions and discuss the subject.

Above the teens are reacting to popular internet meme and song "Gagnam Style."  The teens chosen are anything but shallow and apathetic, in fact quite the opposite.  Vibrant, intelligent, and often very funny themselves, this group of young people exhibit an almost opposite demeanor than that of the stereotypically ignorant youth on the internet.

However what if the teenagers were faced with a much more serious topic, something more close to home like that of the death of Amanda Todd?  Amanda was herself a young person, who made headlines everywhere when her inablility to escape bullying drove her to commit suicide.  What will the teenagers who were so interesting in the video above think? How will they react? Well The Fine Brothers wondered this as well, so they showed the teens, and this is what happened:




They react not only with shock and emotion, but again with real insight.  Not only have some of the teens even heard about her, but it moves them to tears.  The incredible sadness and hopelessness felt by Amanda is understood, and the teens recognize this.  They empathize, and wish there was something they could have done, with some of the teens even discussing their own experiences with bullying.  The teens showcase their complexity, intelligence, and trans-parity.  These young people are far from the stereotypes of ignorance and "apathetic youth."

This video series is just a small example of the flipside, what young people can really be like, and how many of them are.  It can be so easy to use the ignorant tweets and vapid TV shows, and look past examples like what The Fine Brothers are doing.  I would encourage people to not form such an easy opinion on such a large group of our society.

It is far too easy to be cynical, and use negative portrayals of young people in media to form a terrible opinion of youth, and thereby dismiss a whole generation.  I think that would be a great mistake in judgment.  I urge the reader, to not practice their own ignorance, and remember that next time you see youth being shallow online, remember these examples and that the voices of a few don't always speak for the many.


What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine

Friday, February 22, 2013

Bang With Friends Finally Lets Facebook Pals Objectify Each Other Easily

Ever since the early days of the internet, where young people trolled chatrooms, people have used their computers to have sex with each other.  Now a new a new app entitled "Bang With Friends" allows you to check out who is looking for a hookup through your Facebook profile.

The Hell with this!
The new app, which was developed by three anonymous guys who VICE mag describes as:

"three anonymous people who were too scared to talk on the phone, but who are apparently from California and apparently also all dudes"

The app allows users to anonymously peruse their Facebook friends and select who they would like to "know better."  The catch is you only find out who wants to bone you if they also have used the app and selected you.  If both ends don't select each other, you will not see their photo.  Bored on the internet?  Why don't you objectify the people you know online?

Currently the app is in very early stages.  As of now users are able to pick out their relatives, adding a very disturbing edge to the functionality.  Also, apparently gay men and women aren't allowed to bang each other either, as the app doesn't include same sex selections.

The app is a strange creation, in an age where people are already over objectified and scrutinized online.  While it probably won't change the way people casually hook up online, it is a notable sign of the times we live in. 


What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine



Thursday, February 21, 2013

Sony Unveils Playstation 4 In New York City The Internet Is Finally Excited By Something

Last night in New York City, Sony held their much discussed "Playstation Meeting" to the press.  Streaming the event online millions of people, the electronics giant finally unveiled their next video game console, the Playstation 4.  Also known as one of the few times video games will be in the actual news in a positive light.

Many rumors leading up to the event were addressed along with various features, plans, and actual game footage.  Throughout the two and a half hour presentation, the internet and gaming press was awash with fervor, fans finally experiencing a new generation of consoles after 7 years of the Playstation 3.  Sony fans everywhere smashed their PS3s in delightful exuberance.

Don't need that piece of crap anymore!

The announcement of the console came shortly into the beginning of the event.  Although despite not showing what the actual console would physically look like, Sony addressed many other aspects behind the design and expected features for the PS4.

The insides of the console were described in detail and provide for a very powerful machine.  Introduced first was veteran game designer and PS4 console lead designer Mark Cerny to discuss the power behind the PS4 in an explicit way.  The console will include an internal hard-drive, along with

Designed PS4, eh? Design yourself a new haircut.

Sony also unveiled the Dual Shock 4 controller, which confirmed the rumored design pictures that leaked to the internet before the event.  The controller was not discussed in detail, although the design is definitely a new direction for Sony.  Mentioned though, was a dedicated share button, which will allow gamers to instantly share portions of their game-play in a TiVo like feature.

Check me out yo!

Adding to the announced share feature, Sony outlined plans for revolutionary steps into the new generation of video games.  PS4 will focus on a concerted effort to connect users to social networks and social aspects of video games.  This includes the ability to suspend playing a game by pressing the power button and instantly resume playing later.  Users will be able to connect to friends and at the touch of a button stream live game-play from their system, conversely friends on Playstation Network will be able to watch live footage of their friends and even jump into their game to take over their controller and help them with a particularly difficult level.

Emphasis on sharing was also addressed with the addition of fast software streaming where users can instantly choose a game from the store and begin play while it is still downloading.  They will also be able to try out a game and play it immediately before deciding if they would like to buy it. 

Many game developers were welcomed to the stage including Square Enix, Jonathan Blow, Capcom, Guerilla Games, and Ubisoft.  A notable game shown off were Guerilla games' new installment in the Playstation exclusive series Killzone with Killzone Shadowfall.  Also a representative from Bungie, now free from Microsoft took the stage to discuss their plans for their new game Destiny on the PS4.  Quantic Dream studio head David Cage who showcased some of the hardware power with a demonstration of design by showing an impressive 3D model of the Crypt Keeper before he died.

Tell me that's not creepy!

Japanese developer and brand manager Shinji Hashimoto from Square Enix also announced their partnership in thick Japanese accents.  I am not going to make fun of him at all because speaking to millions in your second language has got to be crazy!

Overall the meeting was a revitalization for fans and the gaming press, which has become semi-stagnant waiting for new console news.  Sony made an impressive statement for their plans going forward and revitalizing the video game console market with innovative ideas.



Wednesday, February 20, 2013

Armed Theives Put Heist Movies To Shame With $50 Million Diamond Robbery

It all happened in less than 5 minutes.  This past Monday a Helvetic Airlines flight from Belgium to Zurich was robbed of around $50 million worth of uncut diamonds by a highly professional group of thieves.  Heist movie directors everywhere immediately begin work on scripts involving Robert DeNiro.

Who else would you cast?

The diamonds were taken while the airplane, which had already been boarded by passengers, was being loaded with cargo before the scheduled takeoff.  An armored Brinks truck was loading the diamonds, when two vehicles drove onto the runway through the airport fences.

The vehicles approached the truck and eight thieves, allegedly dressed to resemble police, flashed automatic weapons and held up the armored truck crew.  The thieves took the diamonds and fled the scene.  Later it was reported that one of the vehicles had been found burned out elsewhere.  The heist was performed so smoothly that many passengers on the flight were unaware anything had happened.

In a quote a Belgian police officer made everyone who has seen "Ocean's 11" slap their forehead when he said:

"This was undoubtedly a highly professional job."

Experts have commented on the heist as "brazen" and "clever"  as it seems that the theives knew exactly what they were coming for and despite carrying weapons didnt need to fire one shot.  The target, the diamonds, were also a good choice as they are a small package that is a high value.  It is supposed that the thieves had possibly already set up a buyer for the stolen goods.


Probably from someone who looks like this.

The man hunt continues for the eight perpetrators.  Although authorities are not expecting to recover the diamonds, because of their state when they were stolen.  The uncut diamonds, which were en route to be tagged, labeled, and accounted for, were taken while still unmarked.  In the meantime Hollywood agents are in a frenzy casting "Heat 2: Airport Style."

What do you MEAN Val Kilmer isn't available!??!?!


What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine


Music Review: Long. Live. ASAP. By ASAP Rocky

This week I decided to review an album that has been on almost nonstop rotation since it's release on January 15 of this year.  That particular album is the debut of Harlem MC and de-facto leader of ASAP mob, ASAP Rocky which is entitled "Live. Love. ASAP."


 Rocky spent most of last year building his already white hot buzz by releasing interesting material in the form of mix-tapes, showcasing his Southern flavored NYC rap and introducing his rather large crew of rappers.  For his debut Rocky has developed a unique mix of Southern "trill" style rap with his fashion conscious, smooth style to create a refreshing and interesting product that doesn't dissappoint.

The album, which features production from the likes of Hit-Boy, Clams Casino, Danger Mouse, Noah Shebib, and surprising appearance from electronic music's current king Skrillex. Each producer has time to shine on a rather eclectic composition that fits well with Rocky's own unique flavor.

Rocky and his ASAP crew, (consisting of various MC's, in house producers, and managers) encompass a crew that is very fashionable and fashion conscious, name checking popular brands like Alexander McQueen and Black Scale.  Rocky combines this with interesting and clever lyrics that address street life, getting money, and the pleasure of women's company.  This is all mixed in with the southern "screwed and chopped" slowed down feel that came straight out of Houston in the early part of the last decade.

Rocky makes no bones about showcasing the influence on his music of the dominance that southern hip hop music has made on modern rap since the early 2000's.  Most of the biggest artists of right now are from the south (2 Chainz, Lil Wayne, Future) and instead of adhering to the archaic idea of what an NYC rapper is "supposed" to sound like he embraces it.

The album is peppered with rising and falling vibes that flow well together.  Rocky also delivers variety in the delivery of his verses and cadences, from singing to super fast flow into slowed down drugged out ad-libs.

Guests on the album are interesting choices as well, with Rocky opting not to flood the track list with features.  Only one ASAP crew member makes an appearance on the deluxe version, ASAP Nast.  Rocky instead chooses to make the features count and includes eclectic singer Santigold, Skrilex, and MMG rapper Gunplay.  Rocky also gets features from the noted "new school" of buzzing new artists from last year.  A virtual who's who of Kendrick Lamar, Yelawolf, Action Bronson, Joey Badass, Danny Brown and Big KRIT who appear on the standout track from the album entitled "1 Train."

ASAP Crew, Rocky pictured fourth from left.
"1 Train" is established as an almost instant classic,  a posse cut where all 7 MC's give their best verse over a beat produced by Hit-Boy that has no hook, just every notable hot rapper showcasing their considerable talent.  This kind of song hasn't been seen very often since the days of Wu-Tang's own 1997 posse song "Triumph" proving "1 Train" is in good company.

Other notable tracks include "Fashion Killa" an almost sugary pop song where Rocky pines for a very fashionable young lady.  "Angels," a crew representing track where Rocky assures that his young members are "letting it fly" and he doesn't mean pigeons.  Also massive hit "F*ckin Problems," where Rocky with help from superstars 2 Chainz and Drake on the hook posits that he doesn't have problems f*cking but his love for sexy women presents said problems.  Finally, the very interesting team up with Skrillex in "Wild For the Night" makes a straight EDM Hip Hop song, Rocky again embracing what is arguably the most dominant force in popular music right now, which is of course electronic dance music.

Overall the album is a fun time, something to throw on and let play out in it's entirety.  Rocky combines many facets of popular rap from the past few years into a product that keeps his star on the rise. Check it out!

4 out of 5 stars.


What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine


Tuesday, February 19, 2013

RiFF RaFF The Most Original Guy On The Internet

I first featured the internet sensation known as Riff Raff in my Fundays feature, where he took the inaugural Hall of Fame for the week.  A distinction that, in the views of this writer, he clearly earned.  I have developed sort of a healthy obsession with Jody Christian, the man known as Riff Raff, Jody Highroller, Deion Sandals, and whatever new hilarious name he comes up for him self on a weekly basis.  

Before I explain more about him here is a picture of him on a regular day.

Yes, this is a real person, who is awesome.
I am now going to tell you why I not only think this guy is great, but also a genius,  seriously.

Riff Raff is a rapper hailing form Houston Texas who in recent years has built an ever growing fan base through his constant assault on YouTube and Twitter.  Originally appearing on MTV's "From G's to Gents" show he built a successful music career from his often ridiculous, always entertaining antics.  Riff creates low budget quick music videos for songs that are entitled "Rap Game James Franco,"  "Deion Sandals," "Ace of Space," "Terror Wrist," and so on and so on.

Recently Riff gained even more popularity when he signed a mega-deal with accomplished and respected musician Diplo for his new label Mad Decent.  Diplo, of Major Laser fame and a big time music producer beilieves in the talent and marketablity of Riff Raff, and he is right in doing so.

At first glance one may easily dismiss the hilarious BET logo tattoo (which is real,)  the cornrowed hairstyle, the ICEE cup covered in diamonds that hangs around his neck, and his general ridiculous demeanor.  However, when you realize that this is all his persona, which he NEVER breaks on camera you can begin to see the genius of what he is doing.

Yes, that is correct.  Riff Raff is a carefully constructed persona that Jody has used to a genius level to promote himself and make him famous (and rich.)  Yes he has gone far enough to get a real BET log and MTV tattoo, to help play on this persona.  Not since Andy Kaufman has someone so smartly manipulated the public to attract attention to their talent.  Yes I am saying a man that looks like this is actually very smart.

Riff and Diplo, who would guess they are both geniuses.
And you know who realized how smart this is?  Diplo, the man who made him a lot of money.

He gives interviews, talks on twitter and raps all as Riff, and plays the ignorant silly rapper persona to a T. Here he is giving one of many interviews he has done to a major hip hop publication totally in character.

 


He also happens to be a clever rapper who makes songs that are musically good with real lyrical ability. His songs are often off the wall funny and instantly catchy, and in recent months he has collaborated with major artists including Wiz Khalifa and Chief Keef.  His music compliments his persona, it is instantly quotable and memorable.  Some of my favorite lines include:

"Change topics rap game Bernard Hopkins if I was wood you still couldn't knock me"
"Drink in my hand like a fish fry, yellow diamonds on my neck smell like a dandelion"
"5000 singles in the salsa Benz, Nissan, Pizza Hut, Hippopotamus lens" 

He constantly creates content and keeps his name and more importantly face in the minds of a generation which has been accused many times of having a terrible attention span.  Like him or not you have to admit that is dedication, and a damn good idea.

Most of all I like Riff because he is a breath of fresh air in a genre of music that is often dominated by fans who are too concerned about what "is real hip-hop."  So many people are dismissive of new things and ignorantly yearn for a "golden age" of the early 90's where their nostalgia for when they were growing up makes them dismiss anything new.

The funny thing is they fail to realize how hypocritical this is because that "golden" era they hold in such high regard was a time where every major release was something totally new and innovative, and now they try to destroy anything new that doesn't fit their exacting standards of "real hip-hop."  It is hurting the culture and producing a homogenization and environment where every artist will eventually sound the same.

Hip Hop is most definitely my favorite kind of music and one of the most genuinely American creations since Jazz and baseball.  Hip Hop needs Riff Raff, if not for any other reason than because he is fun.

Rest assured though that I am not the only one who is singing the praise of the unique MC. Riff is currently being featured on every magazine, twitter feed, Grammy party, and music blog,  His new videos get upwards of 200,000 views in a matter of days, and he is poised to really blow up any time now.

I couldn't be happier, because I will continue to be entertained and I cannot wait to see more.  There isn't much more to say, so I will let Riff explain for himself, here is a link to his YouTube channel, and below is a few of my choice favorites. Enjoy!



Here is a Christmas song he made, because of course he would do that.




And here is another great video, one of many many entertaining examples.







What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine

Monday, February 18, 2013

NBA All-Star Weekend Celebrated In Houston With Short Person Showcase

This past weekend the National Basketball Association celebrated it's 61st annual All-Star Weekend.  Whereas most professional sports are content with one day of celebration, the NBA opts for a full weekend of corporate sponsorship, unintentionally hilarious events, and overblown praise of athletes who are often so pampered they make the Sultan of Brunei jealous.

I bet Kobe doesn't have a suit like this! Ha! Got you Bryant!
 So basically this weekend was on par with every other previous All-Star weekend. Talented players chosen from around the country came together in a game where the Eastern Conference plays the Western Conference.  Thereby upholding a continued promise to keep the East vs. West rap battle of the 90's relevant for historical purposes (in basketball form.)

West Side 'til I die!

 The big event of Friday was the Celebrity All-Star game.  An event in which people who for the most part cannot play basketball, but are notable, are teamed with people who used to play basketball.  Former players Clyde Drexler, Tim Hardaway, Bruce Bowen, Sean Elliot, Maya Moore, and Tamika Catchings joined a selection of celebrities. The celebrities' game-plan consisted of  running up and down the court attempting the game of basketball and more importantly, trying desperately to draw attention to themselves.

Participants included musicians Common, Trey Songz, and Ne-Yo, joined by actors Nick Cannon and Josh Hutcherson and track star Usain Bolt.  Comedian (and noted baby-size-man) Kevin Hart also was in attendance and succeeded in his goal to win back to back Celebrity MVP awards for the first time in the history of the event.  Hart led his team which represented the West, to a 58-38 victory.

Hart began the game by forgetting his shoes, and tried to borrow a substitute pair from Clipper's star Chris Paul.  Luckily for Hart commercial icon Lil' Penny was in the crowd and had brought an extra pair of sneakers.

Don't worry Kev, I got you covered.
Saturday saw fan favorite events Three-Point, and Dunk Contest.  Each event was comprised of mostly NBA rookies also known to casual fans as "Who is that guy?"

The Three-Point Contest saw participants Stephen Curry, Ryan Anderson, Matt Bonner, Kyrie Irving, Matt Bonner and others.  Bonner of San Antonio, also known as the "Red Mamba" put up an impressive 20 points, but it wasn't enough to beat out Cleveland rookie Irving.  Irving took the trophy putting up an impressive 23 points.

The Dunk contest included many young players looking to make an good impression on the fans and viewers.  Also, held fast was the tradition of top fan favorite dream contestants (LeBron, Kobe, Kevin Durant) not anywhere to be seen.

This year, rookie Terrence Ross, sophomore Kenneth Faried and third-year players Eric Bledsoe and Jeremy Evans joined James White, and previous dunk winner Gerald Green.  Many props and gimmicks were used including White entering the court with a bevy of flight attendants, and Evans dunking over former Utah Jazz center Mark Eaton.  It was Ross, who would edge out the other contestants electrifying the crowd with dunks that included him donning a Vince Carter jersey for a monster 360 dunk, and jumping over a young child. Carter, was pleased that his legacy of being remembered for dunking was still going strong.

"Most people think this is all I ever did" --V. Carter

The weekend was also peppered by various, often questionable, music performances including Fall Out Boy and 2 Chainz(?), Phillip Phillips, and Ellie Goulding. Because nothing says basketball, like Fall Out Boy. Also performing was noted ivory-tinkler herself Alicia Keys.  Alicia continued her reign as the woman who performs at every sporting event, awards ceremony, town hall meeting, Bar Mitzvah, Bat Mitzvah, Quinceneros, and Denny's opening.  For the performance she did her best Beyonce impression, finally proving definitively that she does indeed have legs and is not an upper torso attached to a piano bench.

I just lost $100.
 There were also reports that an actual basketball game was played.  Said game was allegedly played Sunday night.  Veteran All-Stars including Kobe Bryant, LeBron James, Kevin Durant, Blake Griffin, Chris Paul, Kevin Garnett, and Dwight Howard were also joined by rookies including Three-Point champ Kyrie Irving.

The game itself was an exciting, fast paced exchange of alley oops, assists, fast-breaks, and crow pleasing dunks.  Defensive plays seem to have been outlawed for the night, allowing for a high scoring affair. The West edged out the East in the fourth quarter, culminating in a 143-138.  Notable performances included Knicks star Carmelo Anthony's 26 points and 12 rebounds and Kevin Durant's 30 point showcase.  Hometown favorite Houston Rocket James Harden put up a decent 15 points and six rebounds. 

The star of the night would prove to be Los Angeles Clippers star (and short person) Chris Paul, who took home the MVP award for the first time in his career. Paul continued what brought him success this season, pass the ball to Blake Griffin so he can dunk it.  Paul's 15 assists coupled with his 20 points awarded him the victory.  Proving once an for all to Randy Newman that short people do indeed have a reason to live.  Paul hoisted the trophy above his head, feeling, if only for an instant what it would be like to be tall.

So all your heads are up here? Interesting.
Overall the weekend proved an enjoyable one for fans.  Providing excitement, music, and plenty of tall (and short) men having fun.  That is until next week when everyone gets traded and starts holding press conferences to say how upset they are.  See you then!



What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to like and follow the blog or to contact me on Twitter +Lucas Blaine


Michael Jordan Celebrates 50th Birthday So People Can Argue About Dumb Things

February 17th marked the 50th birthday of His Airness, Michael Jeffrey Jordan.  The man known as "Air Jordan"  is now officially getting old.  The man who is acclaimed by many as the best to ever pick up a basket ball (and proceed to dunk it all over you) finally has reached the age where he can make the biggest endorsement of his career, membership into the AARP.

Congratulations Michael, you finally made it.
Along with the festivities that accompany of one of sports most endearing and enduring figures becoming a geriatric, comes the enevitable wash of people who talk about sports arguing about things that don't matter in the course of their respective lives.

The sports analyst world has been awash with commenting on the comparison of MJ to current NBA superstars LeBron James and Kobe Bryant.  ESPN, known for being the best in the business at taking a story and annihilating their audience's every orifice with that story until they beg for mercy (see Tim Tebow) has taken to the news in stride.  Positing stories (paraphrasing here, also some of these may or may not be real) about the following: "MJ's Birthday Moments," "Michael's Birthday Celebration,"  "MJ's top 50 moments," "MJ said a sentence about LeBron," "Michael's Birthday Meal," "The Shirt His Airness wore on Feb. 17th"...you get the deal.

Also stepping in the ring of discussion are people who happen to be fans of basketball.  Fans everywhere jumped at the chance to argue about whether or not MJ's posession of more gold trophy's than Kobe matters.  Rather than to celebrate the actual birthday, sports fans lined up to argue by making pictures like this:

Photoshop, the desired way to argue on the internet.

Sure Kobe has surpassed MJ in some areas, and LeBron is on his way to being one of the greatest players ever.  However the day of February 17th isn't "National Let's Argue About Basketball Stars Day" it is the birthday of the man who revitalized and dominated the popularity of the NBA in the 80's and 90's.  Helping to usher in a new exciting generation of amazing athletes.  Let the old man have a nice birthday,  he's retired, let him play some golf in peace.

Over a long career Jordan has sold more shoes, Big Macs, Gatorade drinks, hot dogs, Coca-Colas, Wheaties, and Hanes than anyone ever.  More importantly he starred in this author's movie nomination for "the movie that should win all the Oscars ever award" - Space Jam.

Seriously, I thought he was just an actor.
Apparently MJ also played basketball, spending a career in Chicago where he led the Bulls to six NBA titles on a team that at one time (1996) was considered arguably the best team ever assembled in the history of professional basketball.  His single accomplishments are more than impressive:
"Jordan's individual accolades and accomplishments include five MVP awards, ten All-NBA First Team designations, nine All-Defensive First Team honors, fourteen NBA All-Star Game appearances, three All-Star Game MVP awards, ten scoring titles, three steals titles, six NBA Finals MVP awards, and the 1988 NBA Defensive Player of the Year Award. He holds the NBA records for highest career regular season scoring average (30.12 points per game) and highest career playoff scoring average (33.45 points per game). In 1999, he was named the greatest North American athlete of the 20th century by ESPN, and was second to Babe Ruth on the Associated Press's list of athletes of the century. He was inducted into the Basketball Hall of Fame in 2009."
Michael has indeed accomplished feats which many players can only ever hope to dream of.  Basket ball fans need only utter "the shot" or "the flu game" and other fans know what they mean.  He has transcended the sport and become a genuine hero to kids who never even saw him play a game.  He is by many current NBA players admittance, their total inspiration for pursuing basketball as a career, especially in this generation.  

However sports fans love to argue, and there isn't anything wrong with that.  There are those who prefer Kobe and LeBron and value their accomplishments and future over anyone else.  Jordan has made his accomplishments and they stand in statistics for history.  He has nothing left to prove he does not need to wear them on his sleeve.  Wouldn't it be funny if he did though? If he actually wore all of his accomplishments literally on his clothing, man wouldn't that be embarrassing if somebody did that...

.......Oh......
Too often in the internet age people are quick to argue over any topic rather than address the actual topic.  This time lets focus on a rich bald man who is getting a cake with 50 candles on it.  He's earned it.  You can argue on the 18th and every other day of the year.

However, sports fans must always remember... the real winner of the argument is and will always be, Bill Russell.  Clear winner of both "Grey Beard MVP," and "Guy You Most Wish Was Your Grandpa" awards respectively. Hall of Famer and apparent Morgan Freeman lookalike Bill Russell won 11 championships in 13 years with the Boston Celtics, and you don't hear anybody arguing about him.  Why, because Bill Russell doesn't give a damn.

Whoops, better take these off before someone gets embarrassed.
In all seriousness happy birthday Michael Jordan!  You are this author's favorite athlete ever, and one of his all time heroes. See you next year you old bastard you!

Here is the most cliche video of MJ highlights set to the most cliche song. Enjoy!







What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to subscribe, like and follow the blog if you like what you see. Or contact me on Twitter @LucasBlaine

Sunday, February 17, 2013

Fundays: Where I Show You Things I Like

Welcome to Fundays!  This is another new feature where every Sunday we can kick back together and I will show you some cool things that I saw on the internet this past week.  It can include any number of things not limited to: dumb memes, music, fashion, sports, people, art, video games, and technology.  It doesn't have to be brand new, just brand new to me. Out of all the choices each week I will pick a Hall of Fame entry for the week.  Hopefully you will get to see something you like, and if not, well there's always next week. Let's get started, shall we?

Music

Gold Fields

What is it about Australia these days that makes the country continue to release super fun, super cool pop music?  This is the question I asked my self again and again while listening to these guys.  This band makes me want to drink sugary cocktails and make a fool of myself on the dance floor until I vomit all over my brand new shoes.  You know what, it wouldn't even matter either, because I would be having too much fun.




Grave Babies
 
When I was 10 I was riding my bike around my neighborhood like a reckless asshole.  I tried to do a sick wheelie up onto the curb.  I fucked it up and flipped over the front of the bike while simultaneously the handlebars jammed into my diaphragm.  It knocked the air out of my lungs entirely and I lay on the grass of my front yard gasping for breath.  It is still one of the coolest things I have ever done, and the only thing that would have made it cooler were if this band was playing while it happened.





Haim

Sometimes you hear a band and immediately have to tell everyone you know (whose taste in music you know)  how GODDAMN AWESOME they are and how much you know they will love it.  Yeah, that may make you look like kind of an asshole sometimes, but trust me this band is worth it.  Three  sisters who make pop music so fun if you don't at least tap your foot, then I don't care to ever be your friend.

 


Rocky Fresh

Have you ever been watching a lot of rap videos and all of a sudden you get upset outta nowhere? Like throughout the time you have spent watching these videos your subconscious has been telling your conscious brain "MAN! I hate how all these videos are so derivative of each other, it seems all they are is a dude in front of a green screen covered in jewelry!" But you keep going anyway even though your brain keeps nagging you.  Then you find it, what you may have been looking for all along, an awesome totally original guy/girl who reminds you why you love rap so much, that it can be so original when the artist wants to be.




People

Zodiac MF

I think almost everyone by now has figured out that Twitter is the best thing on the internet right now as far as social networks.  While everyone's Facebook feed has been beleaguered by annoying ads, aggravating armchair activism, ignorant memes, and flat out scams.  Twitter, even though it has faults still seems somewhat pure, somewhat exciting, and almost always hilarious.  Zodiac Mother Fucker (MF) is one of the reasons why twitter is so hilarious.  

This photo explains itself.
 This masked man hands out news like no one you will ever experience again.  I decided that I will let him speak for himself with a choice selection of his tweets, and no my caps lock didn't break, that is how he writes.

On cars:
"ANYBODY ACTING LIKE THEY DONT LIKE A GREAT BIG CAR WITH A GREAT BIG BIG FUCKING DICK ENGINE IS A FUCKING LIAR"
 On "Saving Private Ryan":

''PRIVATE RYAN DOESNT WANT HIS SQUAD TO GET KILLED SO HE STICKS AROUND AND BOTH SQUADS GET KILLED. WHAT A FUCKING DUMBASS. HE DIDNT EARN SHIT"
On LL Cool J hosting the Grammys:

"LL DRESSED LIKE THE WORLDS SUAVEST CAB DRIVER"
Basically you get the idea, and that you shouldn't miss anything he says.  Here is his twitter, you know what to do.


Brooke Candy

I am probably gonna feature her in the music section some other week, but I thought first I would introduce you to her persona.  Current Former stripper, she is a nasty talking, huge extension colored braids wearer, platform shoe sporting, white girl rapper straight out of the streets and onto the internet.  Certain things you see, you just become hypnotized by, and this gal is one of those things to me.  She is so off the wall, so larger than life, so ridiculous, I cannot help but be mezmerized.  Oh she also makes crazy strip club anthem type music that will get stuck in your dome for days.

I am fairly certain this is how she always dresses

  You can check out one of her videos here and decide for yourself how someone like this came to be, and why it is so awesome.
   

RiFF RaFF

First off, no I didn't spell his name wrong, that is how you have to write it.  Second, what can I say about RiFF other than he might be my favorite thing on the Internet.  He is a Houston rapper who has singlehandedly built one of the most interesting and secretly pervasive persona's ever to hit rap music.  Yes, those are multi-colored beaded cornrows, yes those tattoos of the BET and MTV logo are real, yes he is incredibly popular and a rising star in music that quite possibly will be huge next year.  Is this all an act?  I think so, and if it is the dedication he has made to grab fame is like no other artist.  Here he is:

Amazing.
He also happens to post a new music video almost every other day.  Just look at the picture, either you want to see more or not. Every time something shitty happens to me I go home and watch his videos and smile, and all is right in the world.


 Video Games 

Polygon

Video game writing and journalism doesn't receive near the amount of respect that other genres take for granted. There are incredible writers who on a daily basis address their topics in the world of  interactive entertainment with eloquence and gravity.  Regardless of the saturation of video game writing, video games are an undeniable part of modern society and the biggest form (sales wise) of entertainment on earth.  Until now there wasn't one website whose sole purpose was in forming the best and brightest team with some of the most interesting and talented video game writers assembled.  If you even are somewhat interested in the world that surrounds video games. Or why your boyfriend/girlfriend/son/daughter/wife/husband loves so much about games, check this site out. Here it is, check it out.


Podtoid

Podcasts are everywhere, about everything you could ask for.  People love to listen to other people talk about stuff on specialized internet radio programs.  One of these is called Podtoid, it is supposed to be about video games.  What it is really about is 2 hours of ridiculous, super low brow, NSFW humor that is so bizarre you have to hear it for yourself.  The hosts Jim Sterling, Jonathan Holmes, and Conrad Zimmerman (who are all employees of video game website Destructoid.com) discuss topics ranging from Sterling's undying love of Holmes, an obsession with Willem Dafoe, and various skits that are sometimes disgusting and always funny.  Very rarely, they even talk about video games and provide some incredibly poignant and intelligent opinions between the zaniness.  Watch the animated video below created by a fan of the podcast Thomas Truong.  It features a snippet of what a regular episode is like. If you like it by all means tune in on Thursdays right here. If not STAY AWAY, it's just not for you.




Funday Hall of Fame

Riff Raff

Come on, could it be anyone else?
 

Who else could it be but my current favorite person on the internet?!? A guy who constantly describes himself as "Rap Game-INSERT RIDICULOUS REFERENCE" (ex. Rap Game Herman Caine, Rap Game Johnny Bravo, Rap Game Julio Franco) is someone who I am gonna like. Despite the fact that he makes music that is the best awful music I have ever heard. Everything about the way he talks, the way he looks, and his meteoric rise to fame. I have already decided to give him his own article, a persona like that just cannot be contained here. Until then follow his Twitter. It will make your day, I promise you. Also, watch this video, its the best.




THAT'S ALL!



Well we did it, our first Funday together! Got something you want to show the world? Let me know, send it on over and it might be on the next Funday. Until then, have fun keep checking out the blog and I love you.

What did you think dear reader?  Let your opinion be heard in the comments. Don't forget to like and follow the blog or to contact me on Twitter +Lucas Blaine